The random witterings of Jonathan Morris, writer.

Tuesday 24 March 2009

Ladies

A friend of mine has a book coming out. ‘The Noughtie Girl’s Guide To Feminism’. I shall have to buy it to find out if I’m mentioned, as I did go out with the author, for a bit. I hope so; I feel my conduct in that relationship would serve as a valuable warning lesson to womankind the world over.

I’m a die-hard, hard-line feminist. And not just because I want women to like me enough to take their clothes off. No. I actually had a bit of a think about it.

Take all the problems the world has. Global warming. Religious intolerance. Poverty. Pollution. Basically, there are too many people fighting over too few beans. If someone doesn’t have enough beans, they’ll blame the guy who has. I realise I am simplifying the problem, but in essence, that’s what it all boils down to. Lack of beans.

Now, resources are finite, and even with scientists being terribly clever, there is an upper limit to how much food can be grown in the world without seriously compromising the environment. Which means there has to be an upper limit to the number of people. And although I realise there are so many holes in Malthus’ argument you could dip it in chocolate and call it an Aero, his basic proposition is sound. All these problems stem from over-population.

But how do you solve over-population? Well, it’s a thing that in countries with something approaching sexual equality, where women have control over the number of children they have, the population is fairly stable, or even shrinking. Whereas in the countries without sexual equality, the population is increasing massively because the men think the purpose of women is to pop out babies.

That’s why Feminism is important. It will save the world.